HOW DO I SEPARATE FROM MY SPOUSE IN VIRGINIA?

If you have decided to proceed with a divorce in Virginia, the first step is becoming separated.

In Virginia, couples who have minor children must be separated for one year, and couples without minor children must be separated for six months. Until you have been separated for the minimum amount of time as required by the law of the state of Virginia, you cannot file for divorce, in the absence of fault grounds.

How Do I Become Separated From My Spouse In Virginia?

To officially separate in Virginia, there is no requirement to file or notify the Court of appropriate jurisdiction until you are able to proceed with the divorce.

Simply have a conversation with your spouse wherein you state your intent to separate, documenting the date this conversation occurred on in writing. Record this date either by contacting your spouse in writing after the conversation or in journal format. Recording the conversation is not necessary.

Thereafter, you must begin living separately; this means no longer participating in a romantic relationship with your spouse, no longer engaging in intimate activities with your spouse, not attempting to reconcile with your spouse, and living a life as separate as possible from your spouse.

What Does It Mean To Be Separated From Your Spouse?

Being separated means living as separately as possible. That means living as though you are divorced to a certain extent. For example, you should not dissipate marital assets or date as though you are single, but the following is a list of things to consider:

Stop wearing your wedding ring.
Notify friends and family of your decision.
Move into a separate residence of your own.
If relocating to your own residence is not financially feasible, you may reside in the same residence during separation. However, you must stop sleeping in the same bedroom and have separate living spaces in the home.
Stop engaging in sexual intimacy with your spouse.
Change your name and relationship status on your social media accounts.
Change how you introduce yourself.
Change your emergency contact with your employer.
Contact an attorney for guidance on initiating the divorce process, which would support a concrete date of your intent to divorce.
Stop eating meals together, running errands together, performing household chores together, etc.
Open a separate bank account in your sole name and update any direct deposits you receive to this account.
If residing in the same home during separation, divide bills and utilities into separate names when possible.
Stop attending events together where people would assume you are attending together as a couple, such as weddings. You may both attend the event, but it is best to arrive separately and not sit together at the event.
If you have family events to attend, such as when adult children host birthday parties for your grandchildren, arrive separately. You may interact at the event, but avoid doing things that would maintain your marriage in the eyes of third parties such as getting each other food, sitting close together, standing in opposite ends of the people included in family photographs instead of beside each other, etc.
Do not exchange gifts or cards on holidays. The exception to this would be assisting minor children in purchasing a mother’s day or father’s day gift for your spouse.
Cancel any automatic floral deliveries on special occasions such as valentine’s day, your spouse’s birthday, or your anniversary.

Why Does It Matter How I Live When Separated?

It is crucial to live a separate life as much as possible during your separation because if you do not, you may not be able to proceed with your divorce at the end of the period of separation.

If the line of separation is blurred and your spouse changes their mind about agreeing to divorce, they would have a foothold to delay the proceedings. While it would not allow them to keep you legally married to them if you truly did not want to be, they could have enough ammunition to significantly slow down the process if actual or perceived reconciliation attempts took place if there is sufficient evidence to support their claims.

How Can The Hopkins Law Firm Help Me?

The Hopkins Law Firm lawyers Michelle Hopkins and Sydney Remaily are ready to advise you as you begin the divorce process in Prince William County, Virginia and surrounding areas. Please do not hesitate to contact their office today at 571-248-2210 or info@mhopkinslaw.com to schedule a consultation. Michelle Hopkins and her legal team are waiting to help you!